Stupid Jokes

Here is the biggest collection of dumb and stupid jokes on the Internet, where you can find very dumb jokes that are really hilarious and people would laugh at them without a prior thinking because they simply are stupid. These stupid jokes are not only about stupid people but also about ordinary and smart people. Anyway, enjoy our stupid jokes and do not forget to share them with your folks.

Stupid Jokes

Stupid jokes

Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?
A. In snow banks.


Q. What’s brown and sticky? A.
A stick.


Q. Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?
A. Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!


Q. What dog keeps the best time?
A. A watch dog.


Q. Why did the tomato turn red?
A. It saw the salad dressing!


Q. What happens to cows during an earthquake?
A. They give milk shakes!


Q. Why did the jelly wobble?
A. Because it saw the milk shake!


Q. What do you call a girl who is always in the bookies?
A. Betty!


Q. What did the penny say to the other penny?
A. We make perfect cents.


Q. Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
A. To get to the second hand shop.


Q. Why did the picture go to jail?
A. Because it was framed.


Q. What did one wall say to the other wall?
A. I’ll meet you at the corner.


Q. Why did the soccer player bring string to the game?
A. So he could tie the score.


Q. Why is a baseball team similar to a muffin?
A. They both depend on the batter.


Q. Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
A. Because they dropped out of school!


Q. What goes up and down but doesn’t move?
A. The temperature! .


Q. What two days of the week start with the letter “T”?
A. Today and Tomorrow!


Q. What did the judge say to the dentist?
A. Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.


Q. What do you call a bear with no socks on?
A. Bare-foot.


Q. What can you serve but never eat?
A. A volleyball.


Q. What did the teddy bear say when he was offered dessert?
A. No thanks, I’m stuffed!


Q. Why did the barber win the race?
A. Because he took a short cut.


Q. What’s taken before you get it?
A. Your picture.


Q. Why did Goofy put a clock under his desk?
A. Because he wanted to work over-time!


Q. Why did Tommy throw the clock out of the window?
A. Because he wanted to see time fly!


Q. How does a moulded fruit-flavoured dessert answer the phone?
A. Jell-o!


Q. Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
A. In case they get a hole in one!


Q. What did the the tie say to the hat?
A. You go on a head, I’ll just hang around!


Q. What would you call two banana skins?
A. A pair of slippers


Q. How did the farmer mend his pants?
A. With cabbage patches!


Q. Why don’t they serve chocolate in prison?
A. Because it makes you break out!


Q. What do you call artificial spaghetti?
A. Mockaroni! .


Q. How do you catch a squirrel?
A. Climb a tree and act like a nut! .


Q. What do you do with a blue whale?
A. Try to cheer him up! .


Q. How do you communicate with a fish?
A. Drop him a line! .


Q. Did you hear the joke about the roof?
A. Never mind, it’s over your head! .


Q. What do you call a cow eating grass in a paddock?
A. A lawn mooer .


Q. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance?
A. Because he had no-body to go with.


Q. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
A. It let out a little wine!


Q. How do you make a tissue dance?
A. Put a little boogey in it


Q. Where do bees go to the bathroom?
A. At the BP station!


Q. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A. He wanted cold hard cash!


Q. What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
A. “Is that you mommy?” .


Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A. Frostbite.


Q. What are two things you cannot have for breakfast?
A. Lunch and dinner.


Q. Why did the boy sprinkle sugar on his pillow before he went to sleep?
A. So he could have sweet dreams.


Q. Why did the robber take a bath?
A. Because he wanted to make a clean getaway.


Q. Why can’t a leopard hide?

A. Because he’s always spotted!


Q. What do you give a dog with a fever?
A. Mustard, it’s the best thing for a hot dog!


Q. What do you get when you cross a cat with a lemon?
A. A sour puss!


What’s the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?

Snowballs.

Why can’t you trust an atom?

Because they make up literally everything.

How do fish get high?

Seaweed.

Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

Everything’s fine. He woke up.

What does a grape say after it’s stepped on?

Nothing. It just lets out a little wine.

Why don’t teddy bears ever order dessert.

Because they’re always stuffed.

What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear.

What happens when a frog’s car breaks down?

It gets toad away.

I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.

But when I got home, all the signs were there.

What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef but nobody can pee soup!

Stupid Jokes Video

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