Halloween Jokes

The funniest bundle about Halloween jokes on the entire Internet, enjoy them and do not forget to share with your friends.

Halloween Jokes

Halloween Jokes

Why is the pedophile’s favorite holiday Halloween?

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“There’s a maniac living in our neighborhood. He goes house-to-house leaving severed body parts on the doorstep.

He gives me the willies.”


What do rednecks do for Halloween?

Pump-kin


Why did the witch divorce the warlock?

Because he had a hollow weenie.


Why did the ghost dad wear a dress?

He was a trans-parent.


What kind of bees like Halloween…. Boo bees


Q: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

A: Because he didn’t have any guts.


Q: What kind of car does a ghost drive?

A: A Boo-ick.


Q: What is a baby ghost’s favorite game?

A: Peekaboo


Q: What kind of streets do zombies like the best?

A: Dead ends…


Q: How do you fix a jack-o-lantern?

A: With a pumpkin patch.


Q: What did the little monster have in his rock collection?

A: Tombstones.


Q: What does Frankenstein serve for dessert?

I Scream.


Q: What is Beethoven doing in his coffin right now?

A: Decomposing.


Q: Why are vampires like false teeth?

A: They both come out at night.


Q: What type of dog does Dracula have?

A: A blood hound.


Q: What kind of music do mummies listen to?

A: Wrap!


Q: What do ghosts eat for supper?

A: Spooketi


Q: What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

A: Hope it’s Halloween!!


Q: What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

A: Spelling.


Q: Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to school?

A: His heart wasn’t in it.


Q: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

A: He didn’t have any guts!


Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road?

A: To get to the body shop.


Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the ball?

A: Because he had no BODY to go with.


Q: What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

A: “Trike or Treat”?


Q: What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A: A plumpkin.


Q: What room does a ghost not need?

A: A living room!


Q: Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

A: Because you can see right through them!


Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

A: His “ghoul” friend!


Q: Why is Superman’s costume so tight?

A: Because he wears a size “S”.


Q: What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

A: Shamboo!


Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?

Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!


Q: What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A: A sandwich!


Q: What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?

A: A nectarine!


“Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf.”

“Please be quiet and comb your face.”


Q: What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

A: I scream!


Q: When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

A: When you’re a mouse.


Q: What do birds say on Halloween?

A: Twick o tweet


Q: What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel, a Poodle and a ghost?

A: A cocker poodle boo.


Q: What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

A: Mummies!


Q: What is a ghost’s favorite fruit?

A: Booberries!


Q: What does a skeleton say before dinner?

A: Bone appetit!


Q: What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

A: Scarespray!


Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

A: Frostbite.


Q: What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

A: Boo-Jeans.


Q: Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

A: Because they have a lot of spirit.


Q: What did one owl say to the other owl?

A: Happy Owl-ween!


Q: Why is a skeleton so mean?

A: He doesn’t have a heart.


Q: What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A: A fence.


Q: What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

A: Do you believe in humans?


Q: What do vampires take when they are sick?

A: Coffin drops!


Q: What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

A: Count Quackula!


Q: What is a ghost’s favorite pie?

A: Booberry pie!


Q: Where do ghosts buy their food?

A: At the ghost-ery store!

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