Anti Jokes

Here where you find the biggest bundle about anti jokes. Obviously, anti jokes are those jokes that belong to our not funny jokes. Indeed, they are not funny and sometimes they make no sense. That’s what make these jokes so special to some people, and they are derived from anti humor where the audience is anticipating something humorous and hilarious, when this does not occur, the irony itself is of comedic value. Enjoy our anti jokes post.

Anti Jokes

Anti Jokes

Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
Because he was hit by a bus.


Knock knock.
Who’s there?
To.
To who?
To whom.


A dyslexic man walks into a bra.


What’s green and has wheels?
Grass, I lied about the wheels.


How do you confuse a blond?
Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.


Knock, Knock.
Who’s there?
Dave.
Dave who?


*Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother’s Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.*


Why was six afraid of seven?
It wasn’t. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.


A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.


Your friend is so [email protected], he has consensual se$ with other men and enjoys it.


There’s an Irishman, a [email protected], and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.


How do you make a plumber cry?
You kill his family.


A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, “What’ll it be?”. The duck doesn’t say anything because its a duck.


Why can’t Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle?
Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human.


Your momma’s so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.


What did the homeless man get for christmas?
Nothing.


A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks “why the long face?”. The horse replies “My wife is dying of terminal cancer”.


Why did the little girl fall off the swings?

She had no arms.


Have you seen Stevie Wonder’s new house?

No.

Well, it’s really nice.


Why was the boy sad?

Because he had a frog stapled to his face.


If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.


Why did the chicken commit suicide?

To get to the other side.


Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite se$.


Haikus are easy,

But sometimes they don’t make sense.


Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.


Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

Because it was dead.


What has two legs, and is red all over?

Half a cat.


What do you do when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?


I like my coffee like my women.Without a pen!s.


Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: It would take at least thousands, working in highly organized coordination, a task that would certainly be impossible for the common housefly, which has a relatively primitive nervous system.


Q: Why did the raccoon cross the road?

A: It didn’t, it got hit by a car.


Q: What’s brown and sticky?

A: A stick.


Your mother is so morbidly obese that she is at great risk for heart disease.


Man: “Waiter! What’s this fly doing in my soup?”

Waiter: “Oh, I’m terribly sorry sir, I’ll replace this with a fresh bowl of soup and I’ll have a word with the manager to see if we can deduct a sum from your bills for the inconvenience we have caused you.”


What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?

“Robin, get in the car!”

What did Robin reply?

“Okay!”


So, you’re going down the road in your canoe and your doors fall off. How many shingles does it take to refurnish a dog house? True or False?


A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says “why is there a horse in my bar?”


Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing?
A: Because she had no arms.


A student was taking his chemistry exam and desperately needed to pass the final to earn his degree. Two hours into his exam, his cell phone, which he forgot to leave in his car, starts to ring in his pocket.


No one seemed to notice and he got an A+ on the final.


A black guy, a Mexican, a white guy, and an Asian guy are sitting on a bench in the park. They simply ignore each other due to culture differences.


Q:Whats green, has 4 legs and if it falls out of a tree can kill you??
A: A pool table.


Q: What do you call a black man with a PhD?
A: Doctor.


What’s red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.


What did the cat say to the person?
Meow.


A Christian, a Jew, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They have a nice evening and all leave with a deeper appreciation for each other’s religions.


There were two Jewish women sitting on a park bench minding their own business.


What’s the hardest thing about watching a Twilight movie?

Telling your parents you’re [email protected]


Why did they bury the fireman on the hill?

Because he was dead.


What’s the one bad thing about going home for Christmas?
Your family hates you.


Q: Why didn’t Billy go to the party?
A: He wasn’t invited.


Knock, Knock!
Come in.


Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side.


Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

The police! I’m afraid there’s been an accident. Your husband is in hospital.


Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.


Q: Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes?
A: He uses the highest quality ingredients.


Q: Why do undertakers wear ties?
A: Because their profession is very serious and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.


Q: How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One.


Q: Why do women fake orgasms?
A: Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.


Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: ‘Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife’s house.’
The other man replies: ‘Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.’


Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. One cow looks round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off.

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